nothing seems to be working very well
trying to identify and feel my feelings
a sense of despair
like low lying fog
obscuring the sun
That's the truth of the moment... hopefully it will pass, maybe later this afternoon when my neighbor and I take our 2 mile walk with her pup dogs. They're Westies - very peppy and cute. Actually, it lifts my mood just to think of them. We haven't walked for a week and a half... I miss the exercise, my time with her and the pups very much.
Now that we're home again and our county fair is over, I have no excuses... It's time to get back to my food plan and start exercising again.
The motorcycle ride was tough in many ways... extreme heat, two break downs, restaurant eating, energy depletion. It brought out the worst of my entitlement thinking, which resulted in some overeating and poor food choices.
Or, looking at it in a different way... despite stress and hardship, I made some good food choices and managed to stick with my meal plan part of the time. And despite temptations, I didn't eat any of my binge foods! (Oh, I like that better!)
The other good things about the trip are that I managed to stay fairly positive, to look for and find interesting people and things along the way, and to conquer my 30-year aversion to being seen in a swimsuit.
So why, two and a half days after returning, am I so blue? I don't know.
Think I'll end this post on a more positive note by posting a few of my trip photos...
Character we met at a gas station.
My bike and a horseman near a pay phone.
Bare back highway rider.
Yakima River, blue highway follows the canyon.
Temps over 100 for five days of our ride.
Some smart chalk artist marked a remedy for the heat...
Sure fix for a hot biker.
Milky jade, the actual color of the water above Diablo Dam.
We drove into quite the headwind on the last day.
Gosh, I feel bad that you are not at the top of your game after visiting such beautiful sights of nature.
ReplyDeleteI feel compelled to ask if maybe you are experiencing side effects of a med you take. I knew you had some heart issues a while back. Several people that I know experienced weird moods for quite a while after starting theirs.
I know you have probably looked into any physical causes. I guess I just want you to know how to be happy.
xx, Carol
Welcome back:) Good job not eating the binge foods. Now it's time to figure out that blue part. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteI always get post vacation blues. On some vacations , It can even make me rethink my choices and my goals and what life really means to me. I have gratitude for what I do have or sometimes I'm realizing wht I don't have. So big stuff can happen. Shifting back from big vistas, random people and sights to 'same ol same ol' brings mixed emotions.
ReplyDeleteOh, I love the picture of the character at the gas station. And that milky jade water, I could look at that for hours. It's such a juicy color!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on dealing with the realities of road food and not eating those binge foods. A plan won't work unless there is some flexibility there, and you were able to come out smiling. Good for you!
If you're feeling blue now, maybe it's because you're back again, nothing much has changed, and the trip did not magically clear everything up. I think that your walk with happy Westies is the best cure for that low feeling. Joyful dogs work wonders to lift the spirit.
I'm glad you made it back safe and sound, and had interesting adventures along the way.
Fantastic photos!
ReplyDeleteGreat idea to look at the good things that you've done! On a stress-y vacation, that you held it together at all is quite the accomplishment!
To PJ ~ I think you hit a bull's eye about post trip blues being a result of the shift back to same ol' same ol'...
ReplyDeleteTo Carol ~ My only meds are a baby asprin a day plus a few basic supplements... no prescription drugs at all. Thanks for your XXs and same back to you.
To Karen ~ Thanks for the hugs!!!
To Lois ~ "If you're feeling blue now, maybe it's because you're back again, nothing much has changed, and the trip did not magically clear everything up." You're totally on the mark, Lois...
Thanks, Cammy... I agree!
Glad to see you back...I wondered how the trip was going for you...;)
ReplyDeleteI don't know about all of you, but I have found in my life that "life is not fair". I am not part of your blog group, Robin, but I have much admired your beautiful beadwork and creativity for the last year. In my life, I have had many sad things happen to me in the last 15 years...death of my dad, death of my husband at 52, caring for my mom with alzheimers for 19 years, but.... the one thing each day that I am thankful for is that I am still here living in our beautiful country. I always can find a reason to be thankful for each day. We each can make the decision to be happy or sad each day, no one else makes that decision. I have made the decision to be happy, and I hope you can too, because it will change your life! It doesn't mean that we don't have things in our lives that don't need change, for me it just means that I try to look at the positive. :o) Love to you, Robin! Connie
ReplyDeleteWelcome home. I pleased to know that you are home safe and that you were able to stick to your food plan some of the time, were avoid your binge foods complete and that you got to swim.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the photos, it looks like you passed through some incredible scenery. That milky jade water is amazing - what a colour scheme to be found in that picture.
Enjoy your walk, the dogs and the company of your friend. I hope that the exercise, fresh air and company will help you feel your feelings and start to resettle.
I'm sorry you're blue. Me, too, I'm blue. I'll be blue with you!
ReplyDeletePerhaps when one starts to write like Dr. Suess, she should merely say, "Welcome back! Your trip sounded (and looks) great. Such beautiful scenery!"
Don't forget the power of the swim.
HUGS!
Beautiful photos, the scenery is amazing. Keep the positive thoughts about what you did on the trip you feel good about... let the rest go. Each day is a new start :)
ReplyDeleteI have noticed this year that I am always bummed out/blue for a several days after coming back from a trip. I think it's because you have such a wonderful time seeing things and experiencing such a different life while you are on the trip that coming home to the same ol same ol, worries and what-have-you, "real life" intrudes and you miss being out there.
Beauty surrounds us, doesn't it!
ReplyDelete