Friday, May 7, 2010

Out of the Depths...

Seeking a subject for today's post, I opened Holy Hunger to a random page and found this:
Just as I learned that the urge to eat was usually the signal of a feeling that needed to be explored, I also learned that the urge to eat was a signal to pray.... When I confess that I'm powerless, I recognize that I've come to the limits of what I know how to do. I face the fact that my autonomous willpower is unable by itself to stop me from overeating. Out of the depths of this powerlessness bursts a cry for help, a willingness to reach out for a relationship with some trustworthy Other that has the power to save me.
This quote involves two related subjects... higher power and prayer... both somewhat new and difficult for me. I am not accustomed to prayer and I have never had much faith that any higher power might exist, let alone want or be able to save or help me.

I wrote about faith a while back, here. One of the comments on that post resonates with me today. Pam commented: "...I wish I knew the path to faith...perhaps it might start by being thankful. Maybe by acknowledging God's part in all that is wonderful in my life, I can begin to place my trust and even my faith in God. "

This is a very good suggestion for me, because I tend to get all puffy and prideful about how well I am doing with abstinence and following my food plan. With humility, I accept the support of my husband, the help found in writing this journal, the suggestions of my readers, the grace of my OA group, the caring ear of my walking partner, the insights found in Holy Hunger and some higher power who surrounded me with all this good energy at exactly the right time. Gratefully, I thank the Universe for this.

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